Breastmilk Is Sweet. Really, it is.

17 months ago, I embarked on this wondrous journey of breastfeeding my baby. But really, it was only when Skylar was 3 months old that I stopped expressing the milk and nursed him full-time. There are so many things I love about breastfeeding that till this day, I can’t bear to give up.

Health benefits and daily conveniences aside, I love how breastfeeding has evolved for Skylar. When he was little, just the mere mention of “milk milk” and Skylar would go "uh-uh " until he got what he wanted. Nestled comfortably in my arms, he would then look at me with those big, innocent eyes as if to say “ Who was crying and whining moments ago? Not me!”  These days, the breast is like a place where he winds down, catches his breath from all that play, and reflects on baby/toddler stuff. Sometimes, he appears to be in deep thoughts, and then, will break into sudden laughter. Other times, he plays with my face-- pressing my nose and pulling my mouth-- basically making funny and ugly faces on me that actually cause him to laugh out loud. And now that he’s started to say a few words, he sometimes takes a break from nursing to say ‘car’ and ‘mama’. :D

So when will I give it all up? Will I wean him off, or will I wait till he decides that he wants no more? I really have no idea. All I know is that when the day comes, I will be sad. Sad that that part of motherhood has gone, and will never return (until the next baby, that is). For now, I am savoring the feeling of having Skylar come tug at my shirt, and chuckling to see him helping himself to his milk. 

There are a lot of things that only a mother can understand, but when it comes to this, only a breastfeeding mother can understand. And even then, only a breastfeeding mother who nurses her baby, not one who expresses her milk and feeds from out of a bottle, can truly understand what I am feeling now.